What are You Waking Up For?

Another day had just begun, but, there I was on my bed still tossing and turning. There’s this constant thought that I was still letting to unravel. This may sound weird for others, but I believe that the Almighty sends thoughts to connect, examine or cleanse me. Sometimes, a thought is from my dream, and I will linger still to understand more. At other times, it will come to me, and I will let it check, test, guide or correct me.  In other words, I believe these are messages from the Almighty. No, I am not claiming that I am a prophet, but I believe all of us would like to receive prophecies or messages from the Almighty. I truly believe He is still speaking to us, albeit not as clearly and elevated as those of the ancient times. I would like to talk more about this, but, maybe on another time because we are digressing already from the main topic today.

So, there I was, just like any other day, I let this thought or the impression of the Almighty work its way around me, and in me, on what I thought on the idea of the thought presented, how I felt about it, why did I think and feel in such a way and how could I use this.

It was early than the usual waking time, I was waiting if it was really time to get up already or I could still continue to have more sleep. I love my sleep at night because I know and I believe that I reconnect with the Almighty. After a long day’s work of the previous day, I really love and believe that we reconnect and realign to Him again in our sleep or dreams.

I couldn’t go back to sleep anymore, I was really already awake so I washed up, then took a bath. It is really nice to have the morning routine of cleansing before standing in-front of HaSheM and pray SheMa, and all the other adopted Jewish prayers. It is too much effort, but, once done, everything feels great.

The 2 main prayers  that I have been saying every morning for some years now are Shema and Modeh Ani (the first one is about declaring that HaSheM is the Almighty and One, and then, my devotion for Him, and the latter prayer is about giving thanks for His faithfulness for returning my soul  today). It is surprising that the thought I had woken up to, which I couldn’t continue while I was in bed, led me to this question-

“what am I waking up for every morning?” and, of course, the Modeh Ani prayer speedily came to me.

Thus, I sensed that the reason for waking up in the morning is tied up to the Modeh Ani. Of course, somehow, I already knew that there is something special about the prayer, but there’s this gap to today’s “work” that had to be filled in, a concealed connection to work that had to be uncovered, cultivated, absorbed, and savored.

So, why or what am I waking up for every morning? Yes, it is giving thanks to the Almighty for His faithfulness for returning my soul? But, why and what am I to be thankful for that my soul is returned today? In other words, why is my soul returned today? What reason should I know, do and look for that my soul is returned today?

All throughout life and all this time what we hear from the media is that we should  be busy preparing for today’s work, not to mention the pressure we get from self-centered power-hungry bosses if we are unlucky! And how many times, it has been easily bombarded to us that we are to be off to work to serve others?

Something was totally amiss, and, so, I  braved on  to face it and admit the most ignored and denied question but nagging incessantly,

“Where is me, and I in this work that I and the others are off to? In short, what am I in this work?”

I wake up, do my duty to connect with the Almighty and do the work for others? That’s it? Something is not quite right, something is missing. I have to know the missing link. I have to face what I have been ignoring or denying.

So, the Almighty in His goodness impressed in me this…

“You are going to work -to work on yourself, and for Us, first and foremost. In this work, you will see how many times your thoughts wander, and I am with you to help you focus. In this work, you will see and discover your goodness of what you want to do for yourself and for Us, to know Me, the Almighty, that I am here for you and to see Me.

In work, you will see, you are not alone, I am everywhere and I am with you. In work, you will see your strengths that I have endowed you with, be amazed and be grateful for these. Of course, you will also see your weaknesses, and here you will see how I will carry you and guide you through.

Feel these all throughout your being, in your feeling, thinking and whole body. Then, you will be ready to see that the work that you do is for others, too.

See the amazing wonders and grace of the Almighty. So, work is not for others, it is for you, and for Us, first and foremost. See you, see Us, then, and only then, you can truly see and serve others.

By the way, the notion that you work for others includes you. Others is also you. You are part of others, other created beings, whether good or bad, learn to work through that, through the tendency to do good and the temptations to do bad or even both at the same time or simultaneously that is one after the other. Then, see the Almighty, that He is all the way present through it all, and help is always available.”

Of course, I omitted others, because some impressions are personal and I would like to keep it to Us, between me and the Almighty.

So, I woke up this morning, and I am learning to be truly grateful for His faithfulness to return my soul, to know me, to know and connect with Him, and to know Us- Him and me, my relationship with Him, and Him with me. I am looking forward to be truly grateful for work, to be thankful and humbled to be entrusted of working on myself, serving me, Him, and  His all other children, eventually.  Ultimately, to see Him in all of these.

What about you? What are you waking up for?

Shalom.

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